That Nigga is Dead!! Funeral

This is Revrend Roscoe Rufus Robinson from Mountain Glory, Shephard Baptist, today we celebrate the homegoin' for our dearly departed brother, Nigger. Yeah, Nigger got hit with the sick bug 'bout the same time Don Imus and his producer decided to do their rendition of "School Daze" with Ice Cube narrawaitin'. Yeah, the nigger got a good send off. Mayne, do ya know dat the nigger survived slaveree, da civil war, fightin' tho ingians, fightin' tho' messy-cans, fightin' in dubya dubya one, dubya dubya two, co-rea, vit-nam and lets not forget that nigger had to put up wit' white folk lynchin, shootin' at and dog suck on 'em. Yeah, dat nigger was around when...well when.

Nigger has seen some good times and some not some good times, but that nigger was strong and he kept his head up when nigger was down. Mayne, we can't find a better nigger than nigger. white folk said, when he was in bondage, that he was good nigger and how we know, cause nigger told us, he was a good nigger. Now in those days, Nigger had two names, one of course was nigger, next one wuz boy. So if you ask nigger what his full name wuz, he'd say Nigger Boy, my name is Nigger Boy.

Now nowhere in the history of mayne-kind, would you find a more popular person than Nigger, that nigger's name was mentioned with the best of all mayne!...for instance 'member that boxer Mike Tyson, Now that boy had skillz but somehow he couldn't touch nigger, cause ev'ry time you said Tyson, you heard someone say, yeah that nigger was a bad boy!! See!! and everyone thought that Tyson was the mayne, mayne! But naw, Nigger had him beat...yeah....yeah....'ol nigger, boy he was truly something else....And he had all around talent, did you know that nigger went down to Germany in '36 and ran in the 'lympics...I swear to god!! He went down with this boy named Jesse Owens to run in front of that crazy man, Hit'er. Cause that crazy man said that hiz country got the massa race and that his country was purer than the driven sno'. Well our country didn't think so and sent Jesse down to prove them wrong. We didn't know that the USofA sent Nigger too, Nigger was low profile like that, back then he didn't want to make a scene, like he did in the sunset of his life. Well anyway, the race got started, that Owens fella blew out the rest of the fellas in the race..well all accept nigger, cause after the race, that Hit'er fella was heard saying we got beat by a nigger. So know we knowz that nigger can run....yeah..yeah...'ol nigger

Over the years, nigger started to change, I guess he was trying to keep up with times, he owed people money, Bernie Mac is still lookin' for his azz and Johnny!...As a matter of fact, that nigger owes five got damned dollars. And nigger is making it hard for single fellas to get with the ladies, cause all we hear is that nigger can do this or that nigger made her do that and how she needs a good nigger.....Hell the only one single fellas seem to get lucky with is nigger's old girlfriend, Ho Bitch.

Yeah, that nigger was something else and now he's gon' ya'll...Even tho' we thought for sure nigger and his family was done didda in that Katrina. That's all ya heard was, look at those poor niggers. Which we knew couldn't be right, cause nigger wasn't poor, yeah, he owed people money and he never paid his bills, but over-all like we said..Nigger was a good boy. We're goin't to miss 'Ol Nigger and like his massa said when some stranger was goin' to take him...

He saysa, dat my nigger!!! I'll 'preciate if you take your hands off my nigger. Even his massa 'pected him...'Ol nigger. But just because we saying bye to Nigger don't mean that his spirit gone, ya'll. He's with us everywhere black folk get together, he's in our children, he's being praised in our music and even some christian folk are yelling nigger's name...just the other day, I heard this woman yell at her mayne, "Gawd!! Nigger you gettin' on my nerves!!" So nigger ain't dead, he's in us everytime we cut up in a movie theatre, on public transportation or anywhere that interest us....

I jus' wanna say, It's been good....and we'll seez ya later...