Keeping It Right

Keeping It Right is for thought provoking conversationist. It's for those who love to talk about today's issues, yesterday's history and tomorrow's future.

Location: Moreno Valley, CA

Thursday, May 08, 2008

RF23 - So The Rev. Stole Somebody's Wife..

So Revvy Rev. (wright) got busy with somebody else's woman...Man I can just imagine, how that counseling session went.....hmmmmm..

A nicely dressed woman comes up to Rev. Wright's assistant and informs her that she is there for one on one marriage counseling...

Woman: Hey sister Irene, I'm here to see the pastor, I have a 3:30 appointment..

Irene: Hey sister Jackson, I'll let the pastor know you're here...

Sister Jackson: Thanks, I like that blouse, where'd you get it?

Irene: a little shop right off the Kedzie "L"...

Sister Jackson: You gotta give me direction..

Irene: Okay, when you get through, I'll have it...Hey pastor, sister Jackson is here to see..

Wright: Oh, praise the lord, send her in...amen, amen...(sister jackson enters) Oh sister, good to see you, amen, praise the lord, ayyyy man...yeah the lord is good..

SJ: All the time...

Wright: (laughing) yeah, sister amen...ahhh sister the reason why i asked you come in this afternoon, because I spoke with Raymond and he told me the main reason of why he feels your marriage is suffering...

SJ: Okay

Wright: Well, sister, he feels that you're feeling lonely because of the long hours he works and there's no time for you...

SJ: Well, if he knew that, then why did'nt' he change it,,I understand he gotta's work to keep food on the table and a roof over our head...and I appreciate that, but when he's pastor...

Wright: Well you understand, but you want your man home..Let me ask you this, how do you present yourself to him..

SJ: Huh?

Wright: your appearance, are you dolled up or are you Maude upped, with the rollers and know sometimes a man needs something to rush home's your sex life, is everything okay?

SJ: Well, it could be better, I sometimes fake and at times I'm like Cellie on the Color Purple, just laying there..

Wright: oooo, oww! well sweetie, excuse sister jackson, maybe it's you mind if I do a little checky up there..

SJ: excuse me?

Wright: Let me check inside you for any off or loose...Oh! don't worry, sister, if your thinking about sinning by committing adultery...don't, cause I'm a man of God, called to do the shepherds work, and I got it in the scripture right here in Rev. Ike's "I can do all things and thangs!" urban bible, right here, sister, in the book of "Leroy" where it says, " a man called to do great thangs, can check out the inner woman of his stock...For it is not adultery to make sure all the screws are in place...amen!! homina, homina...

SJ: Well if the book says it pastor, I'll obey...

Wright: Bless you sister..

SJ: Do I take off my clothes..

Wright: Naw, just remove the undies, dear...yeah, oh favorite..yeah lawdy, now lean on the table...I dunno I might want you to remove that skirt...yeah, sister, you have been truly blessed....homina, homina...

SJ: Oh Pastor whats that...oooo

Wright: Oh, it's my ruler to see how loose the problem is...

(just then Mr. Jackson comes in)

MJ: What the (bleep)?!

SJ: It's okay honey, he's just checking depth of the looseness..

MJ: Pastor, when you're done, I better see numbers on that funny looking measuring stick under your waist...Pastor? you okay...Honey? Pastor? you gotta funny look on your face...ay man what you doing with that measuring thing, ay man! Honey? hold up I'll get help...

Wright: whew, oh lawd, whew, sit down sister...I gotta tell you, your inner woman is nice...real. nice..

SJ: Thanks Pastor...come back tomorrow?

Wright: oh yeah, by all means, I need to put hands on you...
"I like to believe that my best hits border on felonious assault." Jack Tatum

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